I’m going to take liberties with the fairy tale Rapunzel.
Imagine Rapunzel repeatedly allowing her lusty lover to climb her hair. She never questions why he doesn’t bring a rope to help her escape her prison. And then, one morose day, when he calls from below that he won’t see her for the next two months because there are dragons to slay, she cuts her rope braid in a misguided attempt to spite and punish him and demonstrate that she does not, repeat, does not need him.
He never returns (with a long ladder or a rope), she’s stuck…and suffering.
Oh dear, oh dear, what can be done to help this damsel in distress?
Rapunzel, Rapunzel, who lets down her hair, must grow in self-love or live in despair
Rapunzel, Rapunzel, to avoid a repeat, must grow in self-love or live in defeat
Rapunzel must grow her self-love, not just her hair.
Before we grapple with big issues and the repeating patterns reflected in our relationships and interactions with our fellow man, it behooves us to do the same.
I learnt this the hard way. The way of the short-haired, wailing woman, imprisoned in her self-imposed tower…until…
I looked through my kaleidoscope and understood, fully, for the the first time, what all this self-love malarkey is.
Think of a kaleidoscope. How does it work?
What is in my kaleidoscope – tiny, colored beads and a smudge of purple paint on the inside of the frosted glass base – never changes. The rearranging of the pattern-making-bits (the beads and paint) that occurs when I turn the base of the kaleidoscope creates endless pattern variations, which are reflected and multiplied by the mirrors.
Nothing is new, but what I see is.
We are the pattern-making-bits that never change (I can’t trade myself in for someone else – me is me, I am who I am).
The mirrors are humanity, the world, the wider universe.
Rearrange or shift our pattern-making-bits, and then, what’s reflected or mirrored is a whole new picture.
Same bits, new pattern.
I only have to turn the base fractionally for the beads to move and the pattern to change.
The kaleidoscope of self-love is precisely the same – internal shifts and adjustments to the way we think, feel, behave, however miniscule, are like the movement of the beads. The result is astonishing. What is mirrored back at us reflects this – relationships, circumstances, life events, outcomes, all change…for the better.
If we have little or no self-love we are against ourselves and that is what is reflected back at us.
Believe you matter and it changes matter…the Universe brings you a different reality.
In this version of Rapunzel, when the prince returns after the initial, passionate, bosom-crushing encounter and calls Rapunzel, Rapunzel let down your hair, Rapunzel replies My Darling Prince, bring your own rope, make the effort, give me hope. And he yells I’m leaving then and I ain’t coming back. Rapunzel replies Toodle-doo, go! Nothing you think you’re giving me is anything I lack!
She turns from the tower window and pulls from a shelf: her needlework, manuscript (early self-help) and a great big whopping kaleidoscope of love for herself.
With warm hugs (it’s cold here)…