As promised at the end of the Claptrap Writing Activity video, below is my example of a 250-words-or-less claptrap story (otherwise known as a clory by those in the know; which is you, if you’ve done this writing session and come here from YouTube).
Spoiler alert – discontinue reading if you want to do the writing activity with an unbiased, fresh mind…right now (see my stern expression).
I did gain some traction by heavily hyphenating on one occasion, but felt pretty smug when I counted, and it was still well within the limit of 250 words (238, I believe). The entire process was a thrilling blend of addictive this is impossible and hey! I’ve done it with room to spare!
I present, TA-DA, a clory …
The Unexpected Visitor
A kettle bear was in my living room, wearing my underpants. I obviously forgot to lock the sliding door.
I considered, firstly, whether the underpants were clean. Secondly, that the elasticated waistband had been stretched beyond the point at which it could make a full recovery.
Bear was seated on my sofa, paging through a Getaway magazine.
I stood still in the dim passageway. Kettle bears are renowned for enjoying human hospitality, but lack the motivation to remain on good terms with their hosts. They’re hot-tempered when cornered, as is my aunt who visits for three months of every year.
I tiptoed to the spare bedroom, opened the wardrobe door, removed an item, crept to the kitchen, and out the backdoor.
I was equally Special Forces as I made my way to the front lawn. The sofa has its back to the sliding door. My visitor was no longer captivated by pictures of game reserves. He’d switched the telly on (the remote is on the sofa).
I put my offering on the grass, maximising spread size. I stepped out of sight and whooped for ten seconds, then sprinted to the backdoor and back inside. I paused at the entrance to the living room. Unoccupied. A few long steps took me to the sliding door. I closed and locked it.
I watched the kettle bear don my aunt’s blinding-orange-with-green-leaf-design kaftan. She’s a plus size too.
He looked well-dressed.